Andy Dwyer Goes to the Doctor


Dr. Harris: Look to the left… the right… Whatever April: Are you the kind of doctor who gets hooked on his own drugs? I bet you are Dr. Harris: So Andy tell me what happened Andy: I was reading an encyclopedia and I tripped, or “fell over,” and hit my head. Or “Brain Helmet” you call it. April: Yeah. He sneezed and smacked his head against the wall. Dr. Harris: That sounds about right Well, if it’s a concussion it’s extremely mild so I wouldn’t worry about it Anything else bothering you? Andy: Nope Dr. Harris: Yeah Andy: Well, I mean yeah I’ve got a weird rash in my knee pit area And my tongue on this side doesn’t taste anything anymore Sometimes when I walk my ankles make like a weird rattlesnake sound What else? Things that are far away from my eyes are fuzzy I once ate a Twix with the wrapper on it and I’ve never seen the wrapper come out Also, I’ve swallowed every piece of gum that I’ve chewed for the past 25 years April: Andy! I don’t know! I broke my thumb on the way over here just Fix me! Dr. Harris: Well, I can help you with the thumb, but I’ll have to give you referrals for Specialists for the other thousand things April: Wow, thanks for nothing Dr. Harris. Dr. Harris: You’re welcome

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